You shouldn\u2019t be reading this\u2026<\/p>\n
No\u2026<\/p>\n
Really\u2026<\/p>\n
I should be dead.<\/p>\n
But that\u2019s a story for another time. This is a story of a fate worse than death. It\u2019s the story of my life, or, rather, what was once my life. You see, after cheating death \u2013 what was it? three? four times? I can\u2019t remember, which is why that\u2019s a story for another time\u2026 anyways, like I was saying \u2013 After cheating death, I found myself among the living dead.<\/p>\n
No, I\u2019m not a zombie. At least they have fun. They get to eat brains. Me? My brain is rotting away. That\u2019s why they gave me this computer. That was their first mistake\u2026<\/p>\n
Then they gave me limited access to the internet. That was their second mistake\u2026<\/p>\n
Then they left me alone, figuring I was too old, too much of a dinosaur, to figure it out. That was their third and final mistake.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s also why you\u2019re reading this right now\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
You shouldn\u2019t be reading this\u2026 No\u2026 Really\u2026 I should be dead. But that\u2019s a story for another time. This is a story of a fate worse than death. It\u2019s the story of my life, or, rather, what was once my life. You see, after cheating death \u2013 what was it?[…]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-my-story"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions\/12"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/donfontecchio.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}